| My travels around the world have allowed me to | | | | he would work hard to provide a good life for his |
| experience a different perspective on life. I have | | | | mother. He was a good, loving and kind son. |
| had the opportunity to meet and talk with many | | | | Every spare moment he had when he was not |
| people from around the world who come from | | | | doing this, he would be working on his bar. The |
| many different places. I have listened to many | | | | bar he was building was to provide foreigners with |
| stories of survival, triumph, heartache, celebration, | | | | a place to socialize, drink and hang out. He |
| love and success that have brought many lessons | | | | envisioned his little village prospering with the |
| to my heart and life. There are so many people | | | | increase in foreign visitors to the place and he |
| and stories that have stayed within my soul for | | | | wanted to make it one they would remember |
| me to recall and draw upon when I need a simple | | | | and return to. |
| reminder of how beautiful, bittersweet and | | | | He designed a beautiful, tranquil garden and his |
| magical this thing called life is. | | | | central focal piece of the bar was his prized |
| The resilience of the human spirit became so | | | | possession- the big shell of an American missile, |
| apparent to me on my travels through Asia. I | | | | which stood proudly at the entrance to the bar. |
| have never met a more inspirational race of | | | | On the shell was the name of his bar. Our family |
| people. How often we complain here in the West | | | | lived in the mountainous regions of Laos; a place |
| of such trivial matters and how 'bad' we have it? I | | | | that was heavily bombarded during the Vietnam |
| am completely guilty of this and writing this post | | | | War. We learned about all of this on one of our |
| today has humbled me and reminded me just | | | | last days there in the village. We sat down with |
| how lucky I am. Life for most Asians, despite | | | | the family to have a delicious yet simple meal by |
| their 'apparent' lack of wealth is simple, humorous | | | | candlelight and by the light of the thousands of |
| and carefree. It does not matter what hand they | | | | stars that lit up the dark sky. |
| are dealt they pick themselves up, they forgive, | | | | The mother, in her broken English, began to tell us |
| get over it and make the most of what they | | | | her story. She was only a young girl , 8 years of |
| have now so that they can improve their future. I | | | | age, when the Vietnam War started. The village |
| miss the profound lessons these people taught | | | | lived in constant fear of the continual planes that |
| me daily. | | | | flew over head, dropping their bombs of hatred |
| Craig and I traveled through Laos in Oct 2006. | | | | upon a land of people they did not know; people |
| We followed the normal backpacking route but | | | | who were oblivious to the world beyond their rice |
| part way in decided to veer off track to have | | | | fields and fishing nets; people who knew nothing |
| our own experience at Muong Ngoi, a small | | | | of the reasons for the war and who only wanted |
| Laotian riverside village. It was quite a strenuous | | | | to live in harmony with the land and with each |
| journey getting there on a hair raising bus ride | | | | other. |
| followed by a small river boat - more like a canoe | | | | To escape the devastation and fear, the whole |
| with a motor placed on it. Thankfully we stuck | | | | village moved to live inside the caves of the |
| the journey through to our destination. | | | | nearby limestone mountains. For 10 years they |
| We arrived at the village and found several | | | | lived in that dark, damp, cool cave; daring to |
| guesthouses at the dock but we decided to trek | | | | venture out only at night time under the cover of |
| down to the end of the dirt road to give some | | | | darkness to tend to the fields so they could eat |
| business to the guesthouse at the end who would | | | | and survive. They had no light and little food. |
| often miss out on the majority of the small | | | | Many of their fellow villages died when they |
| number of tourists who filtered in. | | | | emerged from the caves at certain times of the |
| We were greeted by the owner of the | | | | day to satisfy their most basic needs. |
| guesthouse, Nuang Jun, who was gushing with | | | | For 10 years they lived in that cave together. The |
| excitement that we had come to stay. Her | | | | mother of our family met and married her |
| English was very limited but she immediately | | | | husband in that cave. She entered it aged 8, and |
| made us feel welcome. We could feel how much | | | | came out when she was 18, married and |
| it meant to her that some farangs (foreigners) | | | | pregnant with her first child. Take a moment to |
| had come to stay and she really wanted to do | | | | stop now and think of your last 10 years. Think |
| everything in her power to make sure we were | | | | about all you have done, everything you have |
| comfortable and had a good time. She began to | | | | experienced. It's a lot right? Now think about that |
| feel embarrassed that she could not offer us | | | | period of time; it's a long time right? So just |
| more comfort than we would have received | | | | imagine for that length of time you lived in the |
| elsewhere. She had no electricity and little food to | | | | dark, depths of a cave, and that was all you |
| offer us and our accommodation was just a very | | | | experienced; terrified that if you stepped out for |
| basic wooden hut with an outside toilet and only | | | | just a glimpse of sunshine and food to eat, you |
| scoops of cold water to dunk yourself with to | | | | could be blown to smithereens. |
| have a shower. | | | | I'll never forget the silent stillness I felt that night |
| For us this was not a problem, we'd stayed in | | | | as I listened to her story. Words could never |
| much worse and for us we travelled for the | | | | describe how it moved me, yet at the same time |
| experiences of the land and the people; not | | | | removed all thoughts from my mind. I felt such a |
| where we put our head at night. Anyway we | | | | deep love and respect for the courage, strength |
| loved the simplicity and peacefulness of it all. All | | | | and power this lady possessed. I felt so small and |
| we noticed was the amazing view we had of the | | | | undeserving in her presence. I felt that as a |
| picturesque, jungled mountains by the river and | | | | Westerner, even though in her eyes I had so |
| the warmth and happiness that radiated out from | | | | much, in essence I had so little. |
| this kind lady. | | | | The story did not end there. She then went on to |
| Throughout the week we were to spend some | | | | tell us about her son Gai and what we already |
| time getting to know the family. Their 22 year old | | | | suspected to be the truth. When he was eleven, |
| son, Gai, spoke perfect English and he became | | | | he was out playing in the mountains, nearby the |
| our guide and friend. He took us on treks through | | | | village, when he picked up a shiny piece of metal |
| the jungle to visit nearby traditional hillside villages, | | | | to examine it out of curiosity, and it exploded in |
| where he taught us much about the history of | | | | his hands. |
| the area and the customs of the people. He also | | | | He spent 2 months in the hospital recovering. His |
| took us fishing, traditional Laotian style. I spent the | | | | mother was so grateful that he was alive and she |
| day in total amazement at how skillful he was and | | | | did not lose her precious baby to that war that |
| how easy he made it seem. I could not even cast | | | | had already taken so much from her. He lost his |
| the net out in the water let alone catch fish. | | | | arm, and took a lot of shrapnel in the belly and |
| I loved spending time with Gai. Each minute was a | | | | eye and bares these horrific scars with no shame |
| reminder to me of how grateful I should be of all | | | | or anger. |
| I have and not only that but a reminder of just | | | | I did not sleep much that night. In the stillness of |
| what the human spirit is capable of doing and | | | | the night my mind played over and over again |
| being. He was so determined to make his life and | | | | their story. I pictured it in my mind and tried to |
| that of his family a success. He was really playing | | | | imagine what life was once like for them living in a |
| life full out and making the most of his not so | | | | cave not knowing if each day was to be their last. |
| fortunate circumstances. | | | | I couldn't imagine how someone could experience |
| Gai had only one arm. Even though I could see | | | | such tragedy yet be so forgiving, so grateful, so |
| this whenever I looked at him, I always forgot as | | | | peaceful, so warm and loving and eager to make |
| he could accomplish so much. He could do | | | | these foreigners have a memorable stay in their |
| everything I could do yet better. He operated | | | | simple home. We essentially were their enemy |
| with total confidence, grace and reverence. Gai | | | | but to them it did not matter. How could they |
| was building a bar on the island. It was his dream | | | | want us around, let alone want to please us? How |
| and he spent every spare minute he had bringing | | | | could they be so forgiving? My small mind could |
| his dream together. He built everything himself. He | | | | not comprehend the magnanimity of their |
| sawed, and carved and hammered together | | | | character. I could only learn from it and hope that |
| every piece of wood. | | | | I could only ever possess a small amount of the |
| He went away for months at a time to study in | | | | depth of their love and forgiveness. |
| Luang Prabang, the city, and when he was home | | | | |